Sunday, June 30, 2013

Xtreme Grouponing

Posted by Trevor

Before Kristy and I got married, our dating and adventures went largely undocumented: no photos, no Facebook, no blog posts.  And at our wedding reception--a time when you're supposed to have hundreds of pictures of each other together to prove to the world how wonderful you are--we had nothing.  So to capture our awesomeness and attractiveness, we resorted to bald-faced lies (which just so happen to be the best kind of lies).

Defending freedom...

High-stakes racing...

Death-defying antics...

Destroying an entire film genre.

Luckily, thanks to Groupon, we no longer have to rely on my brother's Photoshop skills to live life to the max.

First Up: Segway Tours

When we visited Spain 18 months ago, Kristy's family dragged us into a Segway tour through the streets of Madrid.  I figured there must be an easier, cheaper way to look like a complete doofus--perhaps buy a fanny pack or just wear a Bluetooth headset to church--but we went anyways... and it was AWESOME.  Totally worth it.  It was like riding a jet ski through the crowd of gawking tourists and angry locals.  So when a Seattle Segway tour popped up on Groupon, we pulled the trigger again.

We brought along a friend and booked our adventure on the single-worst weather day Seattle has had in over a year.  Rain, sleet, hail, and beatnik poet hippies everywhere.  Our guide told us that Grouponers only get the lame version of the tour where he doesn't have to actually talk to us, but that was fine because all we really wanted to do was show off to everyone on the boardwalk how bad-A we were on our super-cool training wheels.

Next: Go-Karts

Fortunes have been won and lost and dreams have been smashed on the MarioKart battlefield (stupid blue shell).  And since nowhere else is it legal or normal to zoom past others on the road while laughing maniacally, a Go-Kart Groupon deal was a must-have.  Besides, we really just wanted to tempt fate again by giving Kristy license to speed around tight corners.

Thumbs-up for reckless driving!

Finally: Trapeze Lessons

What the heck, is that really a thing!?  Tell me: How can you see trapeze lessons on Groupon and not buy it?

It might not look like it, but the swings are actually three stories high.  I'm not usually one to be afraid of heights, but after climbing that tiny little ladder up and up and up, I had second thoughts about jumping to my death... upside down... with no hands.

Kristy, on the other hand, has no problem throwing caution to the wind and tossing herself to the mercy of gravity.

What's Next?

If it weren't for discount adventures like these, we'd probably be wallowing in our own absolute lameness right about now, but luckily there's more where this came from, and we're hoping for a great summer with a chance of awesomeness.


  1. This was fascinating but greatly lacking in details. I am with Brad. I need WWAAYY more information about the trapeze thing. You guys are crazy...

    1. There will be a follow-up post coming soon.

  2. Hilarious! I love this post so much. You guys crack me up. Love it!!

  3. Sounds so fun! We love groupon, too. Although we haven't taken it to the extreme . . . . when I get my husband back after intern year, we will have to try this!